Blog Post

Today, I want to share my personal experience and relationship with periods, a female menstruation cycle. I hope that my story can shed light on the experiences of countless girls who embark on this journey every month.

While writing this blog, I am reflecting on my role as a woman who has always thought about breaking societal stereotypes, especially in my personal life. Being a conscious human being gives me a sense of security and freedom simultaneously.

I was just a regular 7th-grade girl when I got my first period. Like many other girls in Pakistan, I had no idea what was happening to my body. I grew up in a large family and most families live in a joint family system in Pakistan.

Family is the place of the first education center for every child but sadly, it doesn’t work like this in Pakistan.

How Pakistani parents raise their kids is a topic we gonna discuss in another blog post.

Most mothers never discuss anything with their daughters about periods.

No one explains why girls have periods, how to cope with them, or how to handle the emotional and physical pain that accompanies them. Mothers often provide sanitary napkins or homemade alternatives, and this happens every month that’s so I was also in the same boat as any other girl in our country.

A woman's ovulation system releases eggs a few days before her period starts. If a girl gets married and has a physical relationship with her husband during this time, the female egg and male sperm can form a fetus, which grows into a baby – Readers this is the basic information I shared.

From years of experience now it doesn’t end here the pain girl feels in her abdominal area, and stomach, and the occasional nausea can be discomforting and make her mood agitated for a few days. It is so important to understand this cycle to provide the proper healthcare to every girl so they can take care of their reproductive organs throughout their lives.

The lack of basic guidance on handling periods, changes in a woman's body, topics like marriage and childbirth, and birth control leave all women feeling unprepared for the journey ahead.

I don't know how many women and girls can relate to this, but it was a pretty dark experience for me.

I still remember staying up all night when I got my first period. I was up all night due to body pain and the next morning, there was even more pain in my abdominal area, but I didn't receive any information about it. The interesting part is that I still experience the pain, but I have one or two people around me who acknowledge it and suggest rest.

Women often don't acknowledge the physical pain experienced by other women; they are equally involved in such behavior.

Readers, women need a hot pack or a hot drink, some have cravings for something sweet, and sometimes a painkiller is necessary. Pay Attention!

Anyway, let's go back to that day. The next morning, as I lethargically prepared to go to school, my mother handed me my trousers while pointing out the stain and said, "It's called menses. You are now a young girl." She had a soft smile on her face, but for me, it was horrifying to see the stain and understand where it came from. In the early nineties, most women used the word "menses." In smaller areas or villages, women use the term "Kapra," which means cloth.

My mother explained that this would happen every month. I was devastated, and emotionally shattered at how shameful it sounded. My mother came from a small town; she was a kind, sweet, and beautiful person, but she had no idea how to explain this to her daughter in a deeper way. I had no support in school either. That's why I believe we need awareness campaigns in Pakistani schools, and brands can also educate girls, men, and society about the menstrual cycle.

Here comes the next part: does every girl have access to sanitary napkins in Pakistan? The answer is NO; they are super expensive.

Many villages and small towns still don't have them in stores.

Let's go back to my story –My mother never mentioned the concept of panties to me, nor did she know how to describe the concept of periods and hygiene. I'm sure her mother never made her realize the sensitivity of the issue or who knows what my Nani went through in her time regarding periods. It's a cycle that needs to be broken. The story gets even more interesting. On that very same day, my older sister dropped a bombshell. She looked at me with a sly grin and asked, "Do you know how women give birth to a child?" I blinked at her, completely caught off guard. Where does the child even come from? She continued, leaving me in a state of shock: "She says it's like where the eggs come from the chicken." YES, you read it right – Chickens!

My mother handed me two ropes and a homemade pad with cotton inside. The process of using it was awful.

I was scared and confused, and it was incredibly challenging. I tied one rope around my stomach and the other one at the back and from the front in a vertical position to hold the pad properly. But I remember the struggle to walk extremely uncomfortably while wearing it. The ropes kept falling from my trousers. My Ami used to scold me while the ropes kept falling outside my trousers/shalwar. I didn't know what was going on. I was anxious and agitated, and it was an awkward experience overall. To make the situation worse, some of my female relatives, instead of offering support, chose to make fun of me and make me feel even more uncomfortable.

As I delved deep into my memories of my period phase, my close aunt seemed confused, wondering why I looked so pale. Her words were, "Every girl goes through this; you're not the only one."

I used to reduce the pain by tying the cloth tightly around my stomach.

But despite the discomfort, no female family member ever acknowledged my period pain.

My struggles, using two ropes to secure the cloth pad, were a mental and physical disaster that persisted until my 9th grade.

I remember my father's business trip to Paris, where our family went, and there I had my first encounter with sanitary pads and underwear - panties. A family friend introduced me to these modern marvels that promised comfort and convenience. It was a small but significant step toward understanding my own body.

In light of these outcomes, it's clear that many of us lack confidence when it comes to discussing our bodies openly. This sense of shyness seems to persist throughout our lives. Women and girls often find themselves grappling with profound discomfort when discussing their bodies. Even though our creator has made our organs, we tend to shy away from conversations about their health.

The digital world has opened up information and support to all of us on many issues, including periods. It's time to change that narrative and foster a culture of openness and empowerment when it comes to our bodies and health.

For Pakistani men who have never experienced period pain, they need to understand the emotional and physical situations of women.

It’s not only about cramps; it’s about a burst of emotions and intense feelings. Imagine a wave of death pain that affects not just your body but your entire being. Young girls need guidance and support during this critical phase of their lives. Our society must acknowledge the pain and challenges that young women face. We need clean washrooms for women along with sanitary napkins and brown paper bags in malls, cinemas, restaurants, and beyond. It's time for us to take a step forward and facilitate our women to be a proud nation.